


The hardest goodbye

by Rosetylars



Series: Cricverse [27]
Category: Cricket RPF, Sports RPF
Genre: Established Relationship, Goodbyes, Injury, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-02
Updated: 2020-10-02
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:34:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26772238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rosetylars/pseuds/Rosetylars
Summary: Over nearly nine years, Pat and Mitch have shared a lot of goodbyes.This one is different.
Relationships: Pat Cummins/Mitch Marsh
Series: Cricverse [27]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1755766
Comments: 10
Kudos: 11





	The hardest goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> IPL (in the UAE), late August, 2020.

Pat was in his hotel room alone, still serving his quarantine after flying in from the UK, pleasantly surprised that Mitch was playing in the Sunrisers’ first match of the new IPL season.

Mitch came on to bowl early in the innings, just the fifth over, against Finchy. Pat settled in on his bed to watch, nervousness in his stomach just like every time he watched Mitch play.

Mitch’s first delivery was a dot, which helped calm Pat’s nerves. Hopefully he was going to bowl well today.

The next ball, though, it all went wrong. Mitch's ankle got jammed in the pitch on his follow through, and Pat knew straight away it wasn’t just something he would be able to walk off.

He looked like he was really hurting, and Pat felt sick.

Mitch tried to bowl the next two balls, but he was running in with more of a wobble than normal, and he was grimacing with every step back to the top of his mark.

He had to give the ball to someone else, after that, leaving the field, screaming into his hat as he did.

Pat felt numb. This couldn’t actually be happening. Not to Mitch. Please not to Mitch. Not again.

Pat flicked through his social media timelines for most of the match, desperate for an update. Was it just a stinger, or had Mitch actually done damage?

In the second innings, as expected, Mitch didn’t come in when he was meant to. Pat half hoped their middle order would stick it out enough that Mitch wouldn’t have to head out there, but wickets kept tumbling. He eventually went out to bat at number ten, walking very gingerly, and just the sight broke Pat’s heart.

Mitch couldn’t move his feet, so he hit his first ball straight to a fielder and was out for a golden duck.

And then came the moment that broke Pat. Mitch could barely put weight through his ankle and it looked a big task just for him to walk off. Finchy went to him and helped him, and Pat’s heart shattered into a million pieces.

***

It was late by the time Mitch got his phone back, but Pat had texted him so many times that he knew Pat was still up.

Mitch called him as soon as he was on the team bus. “Hey, baby,” Mitch greeted, and the dejection was clear in his voice.

“How bad is the pain?” Pat asked without preamble.

Mitch grimaced. “Not too bad compared to when I tore my hammy,” he replied.

Pat sighed. “Mitchy, that’s not what I asked.”

“It’s not great,” Mitch admitted. “Scans tomorrow.”

“I wish I could come with you,” Pat lamented.

“Thanks, baby. I know you would if you could. It’ll be okay,” Mitch said, trying to assure himself and Pat at the same time. “And I’ll see you in a couple of days anyway.”

***

Mitch's Hyderabad were due to play Pat's Kolkata a few days later in Abu Dhabi, where Pat had already settled in at the hotel.

As soon as he arrived, Mitch knocked on the door, and Pat jumped up to let him in. Pat greeted him with a kiss, and as soon as he was inside, Pat pulled Mitch into his arms and just held him.

After a few moments, though, Mitch made a soft noise of discomfort. “Can we sit?” He asked quietly.

Pat winced when he realised Mitch was struggling to stand on his bad ankle.

“Of course, sorry baby,” he realised, releasing Mitch and pressing a quick kiss to his lips.

Pat helped Mitch over to sit on the bed, and he sat cross legged beside him. Pat noticed straight away that Mitch looked tired.

“Any word on a flight?” Pat asked gently.

Mitch sighed. “They’re still working on it,” he replied, reaching for Pat’s hand and playing with his fingers, appreciating the cool gold of Pat’s wedding ring. “Just wanna go home and try to forget about it,” he added, mumbled.

Pat sighed. He didn’t point out that Mitch would have to do rehab, or possibly even have surgery, no matter what continent he was on. But for now, Mitch just needed support.

“You know what we’re gonna do today?” Pat asked, smoothing Mitch’s hair.

Mitch raised his eyebrows, encouraging Pat to elaborate.

“We’re gonna sit in bed all day, cuddle and watch our shows,” Pat declared.

Mitch finally cracked a little smile, at that, and Pat leant forward to press a kiss to his forehead.

“Come on, let’s get you into something more comfortable,” Pat encouraged, tugging at the hem of Mitch’s team travel polo.

Mitch got into the soft T-shirt Pat offered him. It smelt like Pat, which helped Mitch relax. They’d only been apart for a week, but after Mitch’s injury, the familiar comfort of Pat’s company felt just right.

As Pat had suggested, they got into bed and logged onto Netflix on Pat’s laptop. Mitch settled with his head against Pat’s chest, comfortable and content… until he saw something incriminating on Pat’s screen.

“Patrick James, don’t tell me I just saw what I saw,” Mitch warned.

Pat frowned. “What did you see?”

Mitch huffed. “You watched our show without me,” he pouted. “I thought we stopped watching at the end of the last episode, but your progress bar is three quarters of the way through the next one.”

Pat seemed genuinely surprised by this. “Baby, I promise I’ve only been watching those documentaries you find boring. I haven’t watched anything else without you,” he assured.

Mitch huffed, still pouting, and Pat put a consolatory hand in Mitch’s hair as he navigated his laptop with the other one, trying to restart the episode without spoiling anything that he was _sure_ they hadn’t seen.

“When was the last time we watched this?” Pat asked Mitch.

“I don’t know, you tell me, considering you went and watched it on your own,” Mitch huffed, still offended.

Pat chuckled softly at his attitude. “Baby, I promise you I didn’t watch it on my own.” He even went back to his homepage and pointed out all of the more recently viewed programs, as evidence.

They started the episode they hadn’t seen, and settled into a comfortable silence.

After a little while, though, something occurred to Mitch.

He vaguely remembered, just over a week ago, waking up in the middle of the night to find Pat asleep on his chest, and their computer on sleep mode, still open on the bed.

He tried not to say anything, but Pat saw his sheepish smile through the screen’s reflection during a dark scene, and he immediately paused.

“What are you laughing at, Mitchy?” Pat pouted.

“Just realised what happened with the show,” Mitch explained. “It was that night we both fell asleep.”

Pat frowned. “I don’t remember.”

“Oh. Maybe because you were asleep,” Mitch realised.

Pat chuckled softly, running a hand through Mitch’s hair.

“So you believe me now that I didn’t watch without you?” Pat asked.

“Yes, Patty,” Mitch smiled sheepishly. “I’ll take back my requests for the divorce papers,” he deadpanned.

Pat burst out laughing. “You’re such an idiot, Mitchy,” he grinned.

“Don’t worry, I could never divorce you. Nobody else would put up with me,” Mitch declared.

Pat shook his head. “No way. It’d take them too long to work you out. Like how you never untie your shoes, you just pull them on, or the way you’re very fussy about your coffee, and your toothpaste, and the amount of ice in your water glasses, and-“

Mitch covered Pat’s mouth. “That’s enough out of you, Mr Cummins-Marsh,” he laughed.

Pat giggled, licking Mitch’s hand in retaliation.

***

That night, they were sitting in bed when a text came through, giving Mitch the news that he would be flying home to Perth the following evening.

That message made everything seem a lot more real.

Pat and Mitch were going to be apart for a long time, with no certainty about the next time they would see each other.

The soonest they could hope to see each other would be partway through the Shield season in the Adelaide hub, but even then, it wasn’t certain that they would both be there at the same time, or if Mitch would even be ready to play.

Then there was the question of whether Mitch would be in the next Australian Test squad. 

They had known this day was coming, but it still hurt.

“I don’t want to say goodbye,” Pat murmured, burying his head in Mitch’s chest.

Mitch’s heart broke. They had said goodbye to each other so many times over the years, but today felt like the most difficult.

“I don’t either, bub,” Mitch replied, dropping a kiss into Pat’s hair. “But we’ve done this so many times before.”

Pat shook his head. “It’s never been like this.”

“I know, Patty,” Mitch whispered.

They cuddled in subdued silence for a little while, before Mitch started rubbing Pat’s back through his T-shirt.

“I’m worried about your ankle,” Pat admitted softly, shifting against Mitch’s chest to meet his eyes.

Mitch deflated. “I’ll be okay,” he lied.

“You don’t believe that,” Pat pointed out.

Mitch sighed. Pat always knew when he wasn’t telling the truth.

Pat shifted up Mitch’s body so he could kiss along his husband's collarbones. He took his time, kissing lightly, enjoying the way Mitch’s eyes fluttered shut as he relaxed a little. Mitch brought a hand up into Pat’s hair, scratching his scalp pleasantly.

When Pat was satisfied there wasn’t a millimetre of skin along Mitch’s collarbones that he hadn’t kissed, he shifted his attention to Mitch’s mouth, softly kissing his lower lip.

“You know what I’m gonna miss?” Mitch asked gently, between kisses.

“What’s that?” Pat asked, kissing along Mitch’s jaw.

“Little things,” Mitch began. “The way your ring feels cold against my fingers when we hold hands. Enjoying a coffee together in the morning before we turn on our phones, those little moments just for us.”

Pat pouted, kissing Mitch’s lips again.

“The way you’re always rewashing my hair in the shower even after I’ve done it-“

“Because you need to shampoo down to the root!” Pat protested, laughing.

Mitch shook his head, chuckling fondly. “I’ll miss you losing your glasses every morning, stealing all of my clothes-“

“I don’t _steal_ , I borrow,” Pat cut in, smiling sheepishly.

“Whatever you say, darling,” Mitch grinned.

They weren't normally very reflective like this, but Mitch was clearly in the mood for it, so Pat decided it was his turn.

“I’ll miss sharing a bed, because the worst part of being away from you is sleeping alone,” Pat admitted. “I’ll miss silly things, like the way we can only have one kind of milk in the house, because it’s the only one that doesn’t taste ‘too milky’ for you. Or the way you always ask a million questions while we’re watching stuff, as if I’m the bloody director and know everything about every movie,” he teased.

Mitch chuckled, running a hand back through Pat’s long hair. “But you do know everything, baby,” he reasoned.

Pat rolled his eyes fondly. “I don’t know _everything._ ”

“What’s my third favourite colour?” Mitch asked.

“Pale blue,” Pat replied without thinking.

Mitch raised his eyebrows. “See? You’re good,” he said seriously.

Pat laughed, resting his head against Mitch’s chest once more. “I’m gonna miss you so much. Everything about you. I’m gonna feel like something’s missing until we’re back together,” he murmured.

Mitch melted, heart breaking at the same time. He lifted Pat’s left hand to his lips, pressing a delicate kiss to his gold wedding ring. “When we got married, we knew we’d be apart a little bit,” Mitch reminded, despite how much he was hurting.

Pat nodded, sighing. “I just wanna be with you. It’s not fair that you’re injured again, after everything you’ve been through, it kills me-“

Mitch silenced Pat with a gentle kiss. “I'll be fine, bub. Plus, the time zone will be friendly from Perth. We can FaceTime as often as you’re willing to put up with me,” Mitch suggested, cradling Pat’s jaw with his hand, swiping a thumb across his perfect cheekbone.

“So 24/7, then,” Pat half joked.

They were quiet and contemplative for a little while, Mitch gently stroking Pat’s backas he held him. After a little while, Pat spoke again.

“When we were younger, when I thought about our futures, as in, like, when we were married, I always just assumed we’d be together all the time,” Pat admitted softly. “I thought we’d always be playing together, even though I didn’t see either of us changing states or anything.”

Mitch hummed thoughtfully, bringing his hand up to lace it through the long strands at the back of Pat’s head.

“We’ve always worked it out, though, haven’t we,” Mitch said gently. “Almost nine years, and we’ve always worked it out.”

Pat nodded, but when he thought more about what Mitch had said, it hit him.

They had been meant to play each other the night before their anniversary, in about four weeks’ time. They had talked about having a little celebration after the match… but that couldn’t happen, now.

Pat’s stomach dropped when he realised. “Mitchy, our anniversary,” he murmured.

Mitch exhaled softly. “Hadn’t thought about that since I hurt my ankle,” he admitted. “I’m so sorry, baby. I stuffed this all up-“

“No, Mitchy,” Pat frowned. “This isn’t your fault. Injuries are never your fault,” he added.

“Well…” Mitch grimaced, making Pat groan.

“ _Most_ injuries aren’t your fault,” Pat corrected with a chuckle. He shook his head softly, huffing a little laugh. “You’re an idiot,” he smiled.

Mitch chuckled, kissing Pat’s forehead. “Yet somehow you’re still with me,” he pointed out.

Pat rolled his eyes fondly, leaning up to kiss Mitch once more. “Yep, and that’s not gonna change. Ever.”

Mitch liked the sound of that.

***

Pat packed all of Mitch’s bags for him, insisting that Mitch’s ankle needed all the rest it could get. Mitch sat on the bed and chatted the whole time, and Pat tried not to think about him leaving.

When the time did come, though, Pat’s heart was aching as they stood by the hotel room door.

“I’m gonna miss you so much, Mitchy,” Pat murmured, desperately trying not to cry.

Mitch swallowed thickly. “I’ll miss you more,” he replied, pulling Pat in for a tight hug.

Pat let his head drop to Mitch’s shoulder, breathing him in as much as he could. He smelt like home, and Pat couldn’t comprehend that they possibly weren’t going to see each other for months.

“It’s gonna be okay, bub,” Mitch murmured, rubbing Pat’s back. “We’re gonna be okay.”

Pat cracked. A few tears fell from his eyes, and Mitch felt them seeping into the shoulder of his shirt.

“I love you,” Pat whispered, voice breaking.

“I love you more, Patty,” Mitch replied, pulling away slightly so he could kiss Pat’s forehead, swiping the younger man's tears away with his thumb.

They shared a very drawn out goodbye kiss before Mitch left, and Pat watched him walk down the hallway with his huge kitbags and suitcase, heavily favouring his good leg. Mitch turned back to see Pat staring after him, just like when they were nervous teenagers. The similarity warmed Mitch’s heart.

They could do this.

***

Mitch had to go into hotel quarantine when he finally arrived home in Perth, but Pat was only four hours behind him, so they were able to chat at length as soon as Mitch checked in.

They had just hung up, and Mitch unzipped his suitcase for the first time.

Right on top, Pat had left a block of Mitch’s favourite chocolate with a bright pink sticky note on it.

In Pat’s handwriting was a tiny message: “ _Miss you already, Mitchy. Please don’t forget it’s okay to take painkillers if your ankle is bad. Call me any time, I mean it. I love you so much.”_ Pat had signed off with a few little kisses and a questionable drawing... Mitch thought it was meant to be them hugging, but Pat wasn’t exactly blessed in the art department.

Mitch kept the note safely beside his bed. He had to get through two weeks locked up in this room, but then he was free, and he could see his family.

He ran his fingertips over his wedding ring. He could do this.


End file.
